Ever heard about Johari Window Model? If not then you definitely should. The kind of world (fast, competitive, artificial, and technological) we are living in today, it has become very important that we understand ourselves. In the world where every person is battling one way or the other, if there is somebody who can help you understand and overcome the battle, it is you yourself. Talking about the Johari Window Model, it is a system specifically made to help people better understand their relationship with their own selves. In 1955 two American psychologists Joseph Luft and Harry Ingham introduced a model that could prove useful in self-awareness purposes among individuals. This model contains four windows that signify a person’s information and helps in finding whether such information is known or unknown to the self or to others. It also helps a person in finding what he/she knows and do not know about him or herself and what others know or do not know about that person. Why understanding such kind of model has become very important today? There might be a lot of reasons behind it. The most significant ones are personal development and self-awareness.
It would not be wrong to say that we are living in an artificial world- a world where it does not take a minute to get influenced by other people and their lifestyles. No matter how much we have or how wisely we are leading our lives, we will still get the imposter syndrome– doubting our own abilities and achievements. We are so impressed by other people’s life and work that we see our own abilities or achievements of no use. This syndrome is natural. Every other person in the world is facing it and its normal. It’s not easy to see people showing off living their lavish lifestyles, big jobs, and achievements and still not get influenced and eventually depressed for not having it all. If there is one thing that is absolutely real in the world, it is peer pressure. Making friends and being social is fine but getting too much persuaded and eventually doing things you don’t feel like doing is bad. A lot of times people fall into the hole of depression as they start doing stuff merely to please people which then leaves them with the feeling of guilt, frustration, regret, and throw them in the state of perplexion. A lot of times people say yes to whatever others say is because they lack the vision, direction, and thinking. Getting swayed by others is not always bad; many people have given up on harmful stuff after pressure from friends and family. However, giving up on your comfort and peace under the pressure of others is destructive.
Positive peer pressure has helped a lot of kids in finding their hidden talents and making good choices. Positive friendships and connections are hard to find in today’s world but they always leave positive marks on the person. For instance, a group of positive friends can inspire a person to get involved in something he has never thought of like volunteering, social work, community projects, reading, sports, and other healthy activities. There are also people in the world whose influence helps you in making healthy choices and lead a better life. On the other hand, there is negative peer pressure that is more harmful than poison. It does not appear dangerous but it kills the person from inside slowly and secretly. A simple example of negative peer pressure which is very predominant among youth today is smoking, skipping school, attending parties, socializing, and shopping branded stuff only. This is the result of social media and materialistic life that negatively manipulates youth and makes them compete with each other.
Depression in our society is very common today. It can be the result of a lot of things many times we feel low without knowing the reason. It is because in our day to day life we are doing things in the pressure of society and fellows that we do not understand and would not be doing when living alone. Without realizing, a huge part of our body and mind follow the actions, thoughts, and behaviors of other people around us. And this is what later becomes the reason for sadness and ultimately results in depression. A person knows something does not feel right inside but sadly he fails to recognize it. This disease of peer pressure is not only limited to young or teens; adults are also vulnerable to it.
Like a coin, everything in the world has two sides. Every human is born with an understanding of conscience- a moral sense to differentiate right from the wrong. There are a lot of ways through which human nature can distinguish the bad pressure from the right one. Similarly, peer pressure is not ever-lasting. With the help of dedication, efforts, and some rules, a person can resist pressure from others without losing his friends and place in society. The following are some of the effective ways through which a person can lead an anxiety-free and content life.
- Compare yourself with only your own self
In the world where social media has taken a toll and people are obsessed with materialistic things and are always showing off their lavish lifestyles, it’s hard to not compare your life with others. However, it better to overcome this habit of comparing as soon as possible because it does nothing but makes the person sad and ungrateful. God has not made all the humans equal. Some are born rich and some poor. Some are born healthy and some weak. Some are naturally born skillful while others become skillful with hard work. Some are born with higher IQ and some with lower IQs. However, every human is capable of doing something. Humans vary in their abilities. If God has made a human financially rich, then there is a possibility that he has made the other intellectually rich. Similarly, if one is good with debating, the other might be good with writing. If one has the power to rule, the other might have the power to influence without ruling. If one can sing, the other can act. If one student is good at studies, the other can be good at extracurricular. Every human being including the able and the disabled holds some hidden qualities that he or she finds out with time. Life would be a lot easier if we, rather than comparing ourselves to others, do the comparison with our own selves. Our actual goal should be to explore ourselves and see whether we are standing up to the abilities that God has bestowed us with. We should compare our hard work, dedication, and passion with the abilities we hold.
- Make a List
A very good way to check whether the things you do in your day to day routine is good for you or not is to make a list. Yes, it has been proven a significant way to have a check and balance on all of your activities. At the end of the day when you are done with all the activities and at your own; sit down, take out a pencil and page, and start writing down all the stuff you did the whole day. Start focusing and noticing what are those things in the list that benefit you. Similarly, cut off all the things that made you upset or worried. It could be going on an event in the pressure of friends that you did not feel like going to or missing a class that you wanted to take but could not due to peer pressure. Once you start doing it, you will notice how the majority of the things you do under pressure and nor from your will.
- Belief in yourself
One of the best ways to remain contented with life and your own self is by believing in yourself. It is very essential to have a belief in the things you do even if others are not doing it. It’s not necessary to seek out the direction that the majority is following. Everyone has the right to do things as they desire. Go on your way, explore things, and have belief. Everything you gain in life is the result of your own strong belief in yourself and your work. Make an aim or a goal and inspire yourself to take action towards it. Once you start believing in yourself, you will automatically start gaining self-confidence and a positive attitude. Just know that you are worthy. You don’t have to follow other people’s path or life when your own life is making you happy.
It’s okay to be different. In life, you meet a lot of people who force you to think that you need to change yourself or you need to catch up with society. No matter how you are, what traditions or values you follow, what kind of dressing you do, what morals you hold, what thinking you possess, or what interests you have, as far as they are satisfying you and not harming you, it is okay to live like this. Everyone has their own routines and interests. Even in this era, if you prefer reading a book alone in your room rather than going to a concert or event, it’s your choice and it’s normal. You have to love the way you carry yourself and live your life.
- Be satisfied
Every person has their own way of defining satisfaction. Satisfaction comes to all in different manners. To some it is only through money or a big job, to some, it’s about the big house and branded stuff, some get satisfaction by having a big circle of friends around and some by socializing. While there are people who get satisfied by different things for instance, to many it’s about little family moments, to others it’s about their healthy routine and a lot get satisfaction by merely serving others. This is why it is very important to have self-awareness. Know about the things that satisfy you. You might be running after a big job or house, a lot of friends or huge gatherings. But, it is possible that these are things like community projects, healthy food, less gathering that actually satisfies you but you do not know.
Peer Pressure is real and everyone at least for once in their life falls for it. But, wise are those who wake up and assess how it is affecting them. It is not bad having a lot of friends but when you try to fit in by going against your wishes and peace, and then it becomes bitter. Self-assessment is very important. In this world of hustle and bustle, where everyone is trying to persuade and control you, it is very important to give time to yourself. At the end of the day, sit back, free your mind, forget the world, talk to yourself, and try to understand your interests, desires, and nature. A lot of times, we fail to understand our own moods too. There is no harm in reaching out to others too. It’s very much important for parents and instructors today to build a sense of self-identity among children. If from a very early age, a sense of belonging, love, satisfaction, and closeness is inculcated in the child then it will be difficult for him or her to reach out to his friends or family for help in such a situation. After all, communication and listening is the key to all problems.